Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Lose your life, just so you can find it.

Since late June I had been feeling a prompt to "be on the move" again. Naturally, my first reaction was to look at plane flights to Haiti....but, naturally, God had His own plans for what this meant. As He began to unfold a rhythm of events to me, it became so clear what my next step was. But the more clear it became, the more I could feel myself closing off to the whole idea of leaving again.
A room and car of my own, a mature job that paid well. A (almost perfect) boyfriend, friends and community surrounding me making me feel completely at home and rested. Nothing was missing. Why now? Why does God always seem to shake our world when we've finally seemed to slow it down.
So--- I came up with my own collective ideas of what "Go" could mean....Obviously, I was quickly put back in my place, when God, not so very gently, confirmed what I already knew.
"When I ask you to Go, I have already laid out the path. Where you will eat, where you will sleep, Who you will know, and how you will go."
I'm a little emotional writing this now, because I'm thinking about how mighty and awesome out God is.
It all boiled down to last Wednesday when I got into a car accident for the second time this year. I was feeling defeated when I found out the cost of my car and the damage it had done to my "financial and social" situation. I had raised about 2 hundred dollars of support by this time and need over 4 thousand. My spirit gave up as the realty of what the Lord was asking me to do this time around was coming true.
"Sell all your possessions and give to those in need..... “Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. 38 Whoever does not take up their cross and follow me is not worthy of me. 39 Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it." Matt 10

Why would God ask us to "lose our lives".....just to find them again?

I think that this is why...
He doesn't pick us for our strengths, He picks those who are willing because of our weaknesses. When I think back on the people in the bible, the missionaries I know now, and even myself. I realize that most of those people were--- or are unfit for the task they always say their "called to." If we were experts, or if it was easy. It wouldn't require ALL of our being. It wouldn't be me, giving "it all"...."losing my life." Its a hard and narrow journey so that we can willing hold His hand every step of the way....So that HIS glory will be shown more evidently. 
In the past, I suppose it was a bit easier to leave life at home behind "for the sake of the Lord" --Because it was an adventure, and based on some of the life choices I had made just prior I knew God was separating me for a time. 
But its a tougher pill to swallow when you realize the people God was asking to "leave EVERYTHING behind and follow me"....is you. 

I am so blessed with so many examples of how this works. It really puts into perspective what all of our individual callings are. As they all look so different.

 As we read in Romans, the potter will make the clay for the purpose he has designed. And who are we, to ask the maker "why have you made me ordinary" or "why have you placed me here?" ---Does not the potter (maker) have the right to say what his creation was made for? Romans 9

All of this was to tell you....I had given up. But you, as the body of Christ, picked me back up and encouraged me in the way I should go. I woke up the following Friday after my accident with 200 dollars of support, and went to sleep that night after a very humbling day, with $1,000 dollars of support.

Thank you.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Support Letter

"The creation waits in eager expectation for the sons of God to be revealed to them." Romans 8:19

I wish I had more than words on my annual support/ update letters to offer you. The English language is so limited on creative words that are able to capture the emotion of the things we’ve experienced and been shown by God. To make children more than names, deaths more than statistics or heartache more than short stories that we as a culture have been so desensitized of.  It left me wondering how Jesus must have talked to the Father. How He would try to express His love for us or His passion for life. How then did he also speak to us? A culture of ignorant sinners programmed to follow the most popular mainstream at the time. Perhaps this is why we so often pray that the Lord will speak through us. Not only so that we speak truth but so the words that we say would speak straight through to the hearts of people and affect them in a way that creates change.
So that is my prayer writing to you now. That the words you read will start, or rekindle a flame of passion in you for the calling you have over your life. I want to see the body of Christ move in my generation in a radical way that shakes the world and scares the enemy.                                                     But I am no writer, so bare with me as I humbly express my heart.
To be honest, there was short few months when I moved back from Haiti where I thought my life would resume to some form a normalcy. (Or at least allow to me feel a sense of peace in my life at home.) But the more I forced this on my life, the more troubled and restless I became in my spirit. I felt the Holy Spirit creating a sense of urgency in my heart. The reality is; that peace is from God, but trying to find it in my own strength simply wasn’t going to happen. And the calling over my life is too great for me to give in to the selfish desires of my flesh. Finding the mission field of America is easy, but hard to stick with. Resentment and frustration is an easy crutch to lean on when you’re dealing with the self-pity and selfishness of your own culture. The need is all around me but pressing into it and recognizing the spiritual warfare behind everything is a rough battle. Shame on me for thinking I could do it alone. It was a self-righteous thought to think that the Lord was creating me to be a world changer on my own. I needed, and will always need the body. Where I am weak Christ gives me strength, but more often then not, this “strength” comes from another individual. A brother or sister in Christ, gentling reminding me that we are ALL the hands and feet of the Lord, and he created a community for us for the purpose of working together for his glory.
This past year I’ve been working in two very diverse missions; that of the typical work environment and then the passions of ministry work. As many of you know, I’ve been volunteering as an administrative assistant to RJI (Richmond Justice Initiative) an organization that works in the prevention and education of human trafficking (modern day slavery) in the United States. It’s been an incredibly emotionally draining journey so far, lots of work with little proof of change. But I know God has been doing a mighty work in Richmond through many people. And I’m very proud to report that through RJI the Lord moved the hearts of many government officials and VA went from being one of the top states for no recognition of this crime to a state with some of the strongest laws against it!                   
This fall I’m working as a “wireless consultant” at ntelos wireless company to pay the bills and taking an EMT (emergency medical training) class at night.

In January I’ll be moving to my next mission field. I’ll be going to back YWAM (Youth with a Mission) to attend a school called “Community Development for Missions.” The focus of this school is to gain medical, communication and diverse culture building skills. My hope is to apply what I’ll be learning this fall at my EMT class to the spiritual side of healing and community development. I’ve had a lot of conformation these past few months about this decision and it’s been really cool to see how the Lord is continuing to lead me in this direction. I’ll be continuing to work full time ministry while I’m still at home. This includes work with RJI and other various needs of families, schools and continuing to work with missions in Haiti. Including a brief trip back this fall to take supplies and visit with the orphanges once again. I want to thank you all, as always, for the prayers, support and love you have continued to give me in my missions work.

His request was simple “Love.” Love with words and with actions. (Matthew 25)
Your hands send my feet.

If you would like to continue supporting me or to just keep up with what’s going on
You can find me (of course) on
Facebook: Kourtney Hetrick
or email me so i can put you on my update letter:

You can make checks payable to:
Kourtney Hetrick
with “missions” in the memo
and mail them to:
12040 Corianna Lane
Midlothian, VA 23113